Relationship Challenges – Every relationship goes through a fair share of adversities. You are supposed to face a few problems in your relationship. That is how you are going to build a healthy and fulfilling bond. It is all about overcoming all those tricky relationship challenges and being stronger with every passing day. Chances are that you might be facing one of these relationship challenges in your life. Have a look at them and get to know how you and your partner can overcome them without a little effort.
Top Ten Dating and Relationship Challenges
1. Maintaining Personal Boundaries
This is one of the most common relationship challenges that couples face. There must be a time in your relationship when you could have felt suffocated. When you spend almost every single day with your partner, you don’t give them a much-needed personal space. It is a very thin line and we tend to cross it every now and then.
Even if things are casual, it’s important to set boundaries. Sometimes boundaries also shift and change as a relationship progresses, which is okay as long as you both agree to discuss the shift honestly and you both feel good about the changes. To have a healthy dating relationship, whether casual or exclusive, both partners need to know each other’s limits. Discussing your wants and needs early in a new relationship helps set the stage for healthy conversations when boundaries start to shift.
a. Digital Boundaries
Texting, calling, emailing, or messaging on social media with your partner happens frequently. Nonetheless, both partners should talk about what they want their digital relationship to look like. For example, what’s okay to say online to the other? Are you comfortable with them following your friends? What are the expectations for returning texts? It’s likely you’ll both have to compromise as you figure out a digital agreement that suits you both.
Be aware of excessive calling or texting, demanding to share passwords, or reading your incoming text messages without permission. These are unhealthy behaviours that cross digital boundaries.
b. Boundaries for Intimacy
An exciting aspect of a relationship is being physical. Don’t feel like you have to rush or do anything you’re not ready to do. You also don’t owe your partner anything. You’re never required to do anything physically or sexually you don’t want to do. And if they don’t want to do something physically or sexually, listen and respect that choice.
c. Emotional Boundaries
Emotional boundaries are equally important. It’s great to spend lots of time with someone, especially if it’s new, but it’s also necessary to spend time apart. Both of you should be free to hang out with family and friends, and do things you want to do, without having to get permission to do so
In a healthy relationship, both partners respect each other’s boundaries. Talk to your partner about what your boundaries are, and listen to them about theirs. It’s important to set boundaries for everything, from physical intimacy to the amount of time you spend together to how they can or cannot use your tech devices.
2. Being Stagnant With Time
Even the most successful relationships can go through periods of predictability and reduced intimacy. A stagnant phase can just be a temporary plateau in a relationship that keeps growing and becoming deeper.
Any relationship has to balance feelings of excitement and enchantment with stability and comfort. However, too much comfort can equate to predictability and boredom. If you feel stuck in a pattern of reduced intimacy and growing distance, you need to change how you interact with each other.
To revive the feeling of novelty in your relationship might be as simple as suggesting a fun new activity the two of you can do together. Having more fun together can completely change the quality of your relationship.
3. Looking For Assurance
If you have ever been in a failed relationship or had a troubled childhood, chances are that you will always ask for an assurance from your partner. They are giving you their time and space. They prefer being with you over anything or anyone else in this world. If that can’t assure you of their love, then nothing else can.
“If you love me, you will do this one thing for me!”
“Do you even love me or am I just one of those forgettable faces in the crowd for you?”
The more you look for an assurance, the distant your partner would get. If you are being taken for granted, then you can definitely raise your opinion. Asking for an assurance will never work.
4. Being Haunted By The Ghost Of A Past Relationship
Once a relationship has ended, you need time to move through your feelings and come to peace with them. Negative feelings need to be expressed in a healthy way. The issue is not about having past relationship baggage. Most everyone does! What needs to be in place, though, is the willingness to examine and work through emotional hurts and difficulties. If this does not happen, then one day a new partner seems to do something uncannily similar to an ex, triggering a chain of emotional reactions. Even though this is a new relationship partner, the feelings are the same, and usually the reactions are as well. To succeed in a new relationship, both partners must be willing to get beyond any past hurts.
5. Surviving Long- Distance
If you can survive a long-distance relationship, you can survive any relationship challenge.The longer you two are apart, the more uncertainties will fester and grow into legitimate existential crises.That’s why when making any long distance relationship work it’s necessary to always have some date that you are both waiting for. Usually, this will be the next time you are both able to see each other.The minute you stop having some milestone to look forward to together, it will become harder to maintain the same enthusiasm and optimism for each other. One thing that is true about all relationships is that if they’re not growing, then they’re dying. And this is more important than ever in long distance relationships. You must be evolving towards something. There must be some goal out in front of you that you’re reaching together. You must have some cause that unites you at all times. You must both have a converging trajectory at some point on the horizon. Not only must there be some shared vision of a possible future for you together, but you both must also feel as though you’re working toward that vision.
6. Managing Finances
According to a recent study from SunTrust, among those who indicate they have relationship stress, finances top the list of reasons at 35 per cent . A separate poll from the American Psychological Association revealed that almost a third of adults with partners (31 per cent) report that money is a major source of conflict in their relationship.
The most important thing, then, is to find common ground and agree on at least the basics of how you will discuss and manage your collective finances. This will likely require some level of compromise which, as we know, can be a good thing if the consequences of the compromise make sense for the short and long term. At the most foundational level, just talking about the finances on a regular basis with your partner is a step in the right direction.
7. The Moving-In Transition
Going from living on your own or with family to living with your partner is going to be a pretty big transition, no matter how much you discuss things beforehand. But there are some major deal (and relationship) breakers that you can iron out before moving in by asking the important questions and answering your partner’s honestly. You may even learn your lifestyles are incompatible going ahead. Or you may find that you’re totally in sync! Mostly, it’s important to have these conversations to protect yourself. After all, living together can be a pretty big deal. Both your personal and financial lives are going to be involved in a way that only happens when you start sharing an address.
To make sure that you experience this transition smoothly, take it one step at a time. Don’t simply pack your bags and move in with someone. Start by spending a night and after a few months, stay with them for a weekend. Gradually, make those weekends into a few days to make sure you are familiar with their place and that it won’t be something new for you.
8. Having Trust Issues
Perhaps one of the biggest issues for many relationships and the cause of their demise is the result of a problem with trust.Relationship problems come in all sizes and shapes but in order to have a good relationship, it can’t exist without trust.Start out small and work at building trust. Again, whether you’re in a long term relationship or you’re on the cusp of a new relationship, a good relationship can only be built on honesty and trust. Be honest with yourself and with each other. This is the best way to start a trusting relationship. It’s also the way to repair a relationship that has skidded off the tracks in terms of trust. Figure out why you do what you do. You will not only have an answer but you will also discover a repair plan.
The only way to repair broken trust is to get to the bottom of the issue, solve the relationship problems by building trust again, and then move forward. Don’t dwell on past issues but instead look to the future and a good relationship.
9. Lack Of Communication
Communication in relationships is important if you want your loved ones to be with you all your life, and for this to happen it is important to express your feelings to them and let them know what they mean to you. Today, in our daily hectic schedule, we forget to pay attention to the needs of our loved ones. We are so engaged in our daily chores, that we start taking our relationships for granted. Consequently, the bond gets weaker by creating dubiety, doubts, and disrespect. It is better to discuss and sort out your problems in any relation, instead of living in ambiguity and suspicion.
Like painting or singing, communication in relationships is an art which requires skills that need practice. If you would like to improve communication in your relationships, remember the following three things.
Unhealthy communication starts with negative thoughts or difficult emotions. Words are only the result of those thoughts and emotions. So be mindful of what is going through your mind when you talk with someone. Try to understand and communicate your emotions.
Be aware of your inner lens which is responsible for how you decode a message. Simply use your own words to summarise how you understood the message.
Listening is the better skill to practice than talking. Try to listen without thinking of what to say next. And try not to judge what you hear.
10. Being There For Your Partner
When your partner is undergoing stress, he or she may become aloof or agitated and may withdraw emotionally or even physically. This can leave you feeling lonely and vulnerable, like you’re alone or unappreciated in your relationship. Your instinct in this situation may be to withdraw as well, and to treat your partner the way they are treating you. This will not solve anything; you’re reacting instead of thinking, and punishing your partner instead of supporting them. This only erodes trust and pushes both of you further apart from each other, particularly if it’s a behaviour you engage in frequently. Rather than giving in to the desire to “let them see how it feels” and adding to the negative tension within the relationship, take a step back and show some compassion – not just for your partner, but for yourself. By tending to your own needs during these times, you will be stronger, more secure and better equipped to be the anchor that your partner (and your relationship) needs.