“The love between the couple is the real cradle that holds the baby”- Julie Gottman. Child upbringing is a process that goes on from infancy to adulthood; it involves promoting and supporting the physical, social, financial, emotional and intellectual developments. From talking and reading to infants to inculcating values in a child, parents play a great role in the life of a child. In a rapidly changing world parenting is subject to fads and changing trends. It is rightly said that a child comes to this world like a blank slate, therefore it is important that parents give their children a good start by providing them with unconditional love and nurturing them with acceptance. Counseling for single parents in India or outside India gives support to those struggling with the challenges of parenting- all alone."
We have always wanted to be perfect parents and we expect our children to grow up in a perfect manner. In the process of defining what that ‘perfect’ can be , we end up comparing ourselves to others around and get disappointed when the results don’t match our expectations . Being pushy or compelling the child to live up to the demands of the society today can lead to unwanted stress and anxieties in both the parent and the child. Encouragement and healthy interactions can help the kid grow in a healthy manner in all aspects.
Parents are guides, teachers, protectors and providers to their children. Playing so many roles at the same time can be both wonderful as well as a challenge. We always want to be good at parenting but there is always a feeling of uncertainty whether we are doing it the right way. Sometimes in the process of juggling between the demands of work and taking care of the child, it is natural to feel burdened. At times like that, it is healthy to talk to someone who can help you lighten up.
Every human being has an average time frame for physical, social, mental and emotional development. The first five years of a child’s life are the most important for a child’s development. Children may achieve developmental milestones sooner or later than the average but parents breathe a sigh of relief when their child achieves a milestone at the right time. In case there is a delay , parents experience a great level of anxiety about it . Having someone to ease out those anxieties can help you become efficient in guiding your child better .
Comparison And Competition
Children always look up to their parents to receive unconditional love and acceptance, they can be often heard saying, “you love the other one more than me”. Parents want the well-being of their child, but it is important to convey it in the right way. Comparing the child , be it with their sibling or with any other kid can lead to feelings of insecurity , inferiority and even lead to unhealthy rivalry among siblings. In matter like these , seeking help to understand your kid better can be beneficial .
Couple Dynamics And Child-Care
It is surprising to see how a child, be it the first or the third can change the atmosphere of a couple’s relationship. There are pitfalls like sleep deprivation, lack of intimacy and adjusting to new responsibilities that parents need to be aware of and be able to manage, so as to enjoy parenthood. Seeking help to understand this new phase of life can be extremely beneficial.
Communicating With Children
The key to a healthy connection between a parent and child is being able to communicate well. Sharing and listening to your child, needs a patient ear and moreover a mind that wishes to understand what they wish to convey. Conflicts often arise when both the parties refuse to converse or cannot converse in a healthy manner. Acknowledging, accepting and appreciating our children is the key to avoiding conflicts.
The aspect of being a single parent can turn out to be a challenge for not only the parent but also for their child . It creates a void in their life that needs to be filled with love, care and and attention especially if the parent is working. Feelings of neglect are also commonly reported. Talking to other single parents and having a support system helps greatly.
Generation Gap & Social Media
Social media is evolving at an unprecedented rate. Be it Facebook, Whatsapp, Twitter or Instagram, there is no dearth of social networking platforms & the majority of users are usually people in the age bracket of 12-45 year olds. Many parents & elders feel out of the loop when their children talk about a newsfeed on Facebook or a tweet.. Many of the features and apps leave them scratching their heads in cluelessness.
Child with Special Needs
A child is considered a gift of God, a bundle of joy but when the child arrives with a unique challenge then the society makes it seem burdensome for the parents. The child might have to be handled with more sensitivity, care & attention. There might be days where nurturing & catering to the needs of the child might leave parents drained, exasperated & frustrated but in such moments having a support system, equipping ourselves with knowledge & information & connecting with people who are in the same space can give us repose.
Fear of Wrong Choice
What if he smokes cigarettes with his friends? What if she starts dating? How will I monitor their online activity? Every parent has a strong protective instinct about their child where they want to shield their kids from the ugly dark side of the outside world. Though as parents we might feel helpless as our innocent toddlers grow up into young mature adults, the only panacea to this malady is having faith in your parenting abilities, bestowing trust on them every step of the way & letting them make their own independent choices, letting them learn from their mistakes & most importantly being there for them when they need our guidance.
It’s a commonly known phenomenon where youngsters feel misunderstood by their parents & elders because of the difference in age group. There might be difference of opinions & days where children feel that parents are not open minded or are too old fashioned. Mutual respect, accommodating attitude & communication can resolve such issues.
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