Losing The Spark

“It's not like before anymore. We used to plan dates, slow down our day with a quick call to catch up, get upset with each other and spend more time making up for bad words said to each other. Now, we are only hurriedly rushing towards things that don't seem to bring us together at any point in the day. Getting upset or angry is a waste of time, we would rather sleep on it. Some days it is almost like we are invisible to each other. Our relationship is on autopilot mode, it seems like too much work to take a charge.”

More often than not, as part of being in a relationship, a lot of us may find ourselves in a situation where we feel that our love tank is not as full as it used to be. Whether it is the emotional bond or physical chemistry, it is quite possible for one to experience a lack or loss of spark in their romance.

A number of reasons could be responsible for this disconnect

  • Stress due to personal goals
  • Varying expectations of both partners
  • Lack or absence of communication
  • Inability to be open to accepting the difference in opinions
  • Comparing your partner
  • Idolising relationships that are different from your own
  • Built-up resentment towards each other

While sometimes, couples manage to view this concern in positive light and take it upon themselves to work through the loopholes in their equation, at times this drop in or loss of the spark a relationship had about itself may further make way for disagreements, fights, and maybe even lead to a breakup.

How a Counselor or Relationship Therapist can Help:

  • Help you reconnect with each other
  • Making you learn techniques to turn towards each other
  • Help you identify and understand the causes behind your concern
  • Work with you to establish a better balance among your individual and couple expectations