Build a Fulfilling Marriage

The unsurety and doubts one may have regarding their partners and married life can make one apprehensive

In a love marriage, fulfilling the expectations and providing the same support for life long can be exhausting. For example- to be accepted by the new family in the same way as done by the partner; to be loved the same way as before marriage; the expectation for undying support from the spouse.

Frustration and work stress due to workload or responsibilities may sometimes get deflected on their spouse leading to arguments and fights.

Adjustment in a new family with different traditions,roles, expectations or values can be challenging for the partner moving in, who’s trying to seek the love and acceptance and forming a relationship with every person can take its own time.Along with that for the partner who belongs to that family may have to maintain a balance between spouse and parents.

When children come into picture, a lot of attention and time is given to them thus spouses cannot focus on each other, fulfil their basic needs or spend quality time.

Spouses may have different style of expressing love so understanding that can be difficult. For example- one partner may express their love through hugs and physical intimacy, whereas the other one may express their love through emotional intimacy and wants to spend quality time with their spouse.

Partners coming from dysfunctional families or have gone through tragic experiences can have emotional or mental setbacks which can impact their relationships/marriage.

There can be different goals the partners may have in their minds, be it career goals, emotional development, future planning, spiritual likeability, mental connection, etc. Also goals don’t tend to remain the same for both partners so accommodating these changes might become challenging.

In the session both partners feel heard and understood as their struggles are acknowledged by the therapist. Time and effective listening are two tools which provide for a safe space for exploration of their concerns.

The Therapist acts as a facilitator to let the partners communicate through him/her to help have a talk and reach an outcome.

Through the session the concern of the couple is understood, the reason behind the quarrel, misunderstanding or disputes can be revealed..

Through the Therapists eye (unbiased professional help) the couple will be able to see their partners beyond their personal assumptions and interpretation.

Therapy can empower the partners to understand what is conducive for them individually and as couple, and help them proceed further by deciding future goal.

To understand since when the conflicts have been there between the couple. For one partner it might have begun before the other one even realised it.

Hearing out the concern from both of them to understand how a situation or circumstance has impacted both the partners.

To understand what is the intensity of these conflicts and how is it impacting them personally and their relationship.

Marriage is a constant work under progress, and for that there are a few things couples need to understand to carry out this bond. In the session they can gain insight on their relationship, their dynamics, their role and responsibilities, patterns that keep them stuck, feelings that prevent them from reaching out to each other and past hurts that harbour more distance etc.

To understand each other’s expectations

It’s always a first time experience and no amount of readings or hearing can help one understand how marriages work. However, the therapist helps the couple by giving them few tools on how they can make this journey easier.

To look at the situation from an emotional and Practical point of understanding

The counselor helps the couple identify the dysfunctional patterns they have engaged in and wanting to bring a change at couple/individual level is a choice a couple makes at this stage decide what path to take further that is conducive for both of them

The self work is quite important, as the couple needs to implement the understanding and insights by themselves. The tasks assigned in sessions serve as a catalyst for change in the couple relationship.

The challenges in marriage can come in future too, so the therapist helps them learn how to communicate, express and manage such conflicts in future without hurting the other partner.

The couple discusses with the Counselor what has helped them and what are the roadblocks or hurdles faced by them using the discussed tools or coping, so that they can be reconstructed according to the needs of the couple.

Couple therapy ensures upon a win-win situation for both the partners, and not either of them must feel like losing out. The therapist makes sure to empower both the partners and prepare them for future challenges both emotionally as well as mentally.

The follow-ups are required to see how the couple is doing post therapy. It allows to tab the progress and prevent relapse in a marital relationship.