A successful marriage is all about falling in love over and over again with the same person, and choosing to be with them, independent of their flaws and imperfections.Conflict is natural and inevitable in marriages and other close relationships. Ironically, one's experience of interpersonal conflict is often highest with one's spouse, compared to other long-term relationships. Marital relationships are particularly prone to conflict because spouses develop a great deal of shared intimacy and interdependence. These qualities make the partners more vulnerable to one another. At the same time, cohesion strengthens the relationship such that partners can better withstand criticism from one another and the relationship can survive partner disagreements.
The term conflict often conjures up perceptions of hostile disputes and dysfunctional relationships. However, research has shown that the mere existence of conflict is not necessarily bad. In fact, some conflict produces positive outcomes. Conflict allows relational partners to express important feelings and to devise creative solutions to problems. Further, successfully managed conflict can strengthen relational bonds and increase relational cohesion and solidarity. Marital conflict also contributes to the social development of children.
The most frequent topics of conflict in marital relationships include communication, finances, children, sex, housework, jealousy, and in-laws. Sometimes what appears on the surface to be a simple issue can reflect deeper relational struggles about power and intimacy.
Lack of communication and understanding, inability to be on the same page as your spouse, and disrespect towards individual differences may lead to marital conflict. By sharing how you feel, and putting efforts into understanding your partner would turn these negative situations into learning experiences and can bring back the joy in your married life.
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